Why do we hate being told what to do?
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
$0/
(min cost $0)
or signup to continue reading
Even when we don’t mind doing it, we still do not like someone telling us it needs to be done.
We hate drivers that push in, but feel good about letting a vehicle slip in front of us.
The exact same result is achieved, a nice flow of traffic, but the emotions are so different.
My husband actually likes splitting the wood. He gets out in the backyard with his big work boots on and throws the wood splitter over his head.
The wood goes flying much to the delight of our two boys watching from the fence.
But if I actually ask him to split me some wood, he huffs and puffs his way around the house looking for his boots, then stomps outside and splits the bare minimum required.
I’m not sure if it’s a male thing, as neither my mum, daughter or I seem particularly concerned when we are asked to do something.
Each week my boys are having swimming lessons in the morning before school – one on a Tuesday morning and one on a Friday morning.
It’s a bit of a struggle getting up early in winter and getting them to the pool, but when you work nights and can’t be with your kids after school, mornings become quite special.
They have now asked if they can also go to the pool on a Thursday morning to ‘train’. This entails them swimming laps for about 20 minutes, playing for about 20 minutes and then enjoying a toasted sandwich with hot chocolate, all before 8:45.
But every morning when they have a lesson, they hate getting up. They complain about the cold, tell me how tired they are and move in slow motion from the bed to the bathroom to the kitchen to the car.
However on a Thursday, when there are no lessons, they are up before me and dressed ready to go.
They even get their clothes organised the night before – which never ever happens on any other school day!
Asking my seven-year-old why there are two completely different attitudes and levels of enthusiasm for the exact same thing, he tells me that no one is telling him to go to training.
That’s his decision. He is motivating himself. However when I am telling him to go to his swimming lesson, that changes everything.
Now I am telling him what to do and he doesn’t like it.
Being told what to do has never been an issue for me. In fact sometimes I wish someone would follow me around all day just giving me instructions so I don’t have to spend my time worrying about what needs to be done and when and how…