EVERY year Tasmania Police takes more than a 350,000 emergency phone calls - and sometimes those callers are idiots.
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Topping the list of clown callers was the imbiber who dialled triple-0 after a bartender refused him a glass of water.
There was also the customer who interpreted a bank teller's refusal to hand over a receipt as an emergency and proceeded to dial triple-0.
And then there was the woman who deemed her overflowing washing machine as triple-0 worthy.
"Often we get little ladies ringing up saying 'there's a fire but I didn't want to wake the fireman'," radio room Sergeant Adam Baker said.
With six monitors, three telephones and every emergency in the state, at any one time, in front of him, Sergeant Baker doesn't have a lot of time for nonsense calls.
Known as the "radio room", radio dispatch service is actually the nerve centre for emergency services in the state.
Triple-0, the police number 131 444, switchboard calls and after-hour media requests all feed into the second floor room in Liverpool Street Hobart.
In 2013-14 the radio room received 363,000 phone calls of which 46,971 were triple-0.
The vast bulk are genuine and operators are proud of their service to the community but the gratuitous emergency calls can be frustrating.
"We get people ringing up asking for phone numbers . . . for bus timetables, directions," he said.
"No credit on their phone."
The biggest nights of the year are the AFL grand final and New Year's Eve.
One monitor tracks the movements of every squad car on a job with 60-second updates.
During emergencies the updates are ramped up to every five seconds.
"It's saved quite a few police," Sergeant Scott Harrison said.
Another monitor streams in CCTV camera feeds from across the state with police able to zoom in.
Technology on the outside is also changing the face of radio dispatch.
Before mobile phones the radio room would usually only get one call per incident. Now the operators can get a barrage of anywhere up to 50 calls for the same incident.
For an emergency or time critical incident dial triple-0 otherwise the number for police is 131 444.