“We eat everything that she loved, which was mainly chocolate and sticky date pudding," Mrs Kupsch said with a smile. 

It has been four years since Jessica Kupsch, 29, was brutally murdered by her partner Matthew Tunks at the Penny Royal hotel in Launceston.

There was a family violence order in place at the time of the murder.

Tunks was sentenced to 23 years’ jail for the murder in 2012.

Four children were deprived of their mother for life. 

Mrs Kupsch has raised the four children - Jack, 15, Alex, 14, Grace, 12, and Kacey, 4 - since Jessica’s murder.

The eldest three have lived with their grandmother since 2006.

Their father died “not long ago”.

Mrs Kupsch said she’s all the kids have. 

“That's hard, because now they have nothing ... no parents," Mrs Kupsch said.  

Kacey, who was the only child of Jessica and Tunks, had his last name changed to his siblings’, Holton. 

Raising the four children has been tough for 58-year-old Mrs Kupsch. 

The challenge was compounded when she was diagnosed with cervical cancer two years ago, and she is waiting to find out whether she is cancer-free.

Mrs Kupsch said the energetic kids have kept her young, and she sees Jessica in her grandchildren often. 

"Grace is the spitting image of her," Mrs Kupsch said. 

"Just different things, things they say [are like Jessica].

“The way they sit, the way they move their hands."

Mrs Kupsch depends on the children for strength, and said the siblings share “unconditional love” for each other. 

"We're a unit, for sure,” Mrs Kupsch said. 

“The kids, they're all different personalities, but we all pull together.

"I've got a piano and I reckon I'd be in a foetal position underneath if I didn't have the kids.

“I wouldn't be any good."

Last week, the family held a red balloon remembrance day to mark four years since Jessica’s death.

The senseless, fatal act of domestic violence sent shockwaves around Tasmania.

Since Jessica’s murder, Mrs Kupsch has fought tirelessly to raise domestic violence awareness.

"I couldn't save my daughter,” Mrs Kupsch said.

“Perhaps, I could save somebody else's." 

Community members often approach her on the street, aware of her story.

"I've had people come up to me and say I'm doing a great job ... raising the children, or voicing anti-violence on all levels and all genders,” Mrs Kupsch said. 

She feels that the conversation around family violence has gained momentum.

“Everybody … is getting comfortable,” Mrs Kupsch said.

"People have had enough of it and they won't put up with it, they'll call the police."

Mrs Kupsch stressed the importance of adequately funded shelters, services and safe houses for domestic violence victims. 

She said insidious abuse and subtle, consistent assertions of control were red flags to watch out for. 

"It starts little and then explodes," Mrs Kupsch said. 

Raising awareness among young people is key to breaking the cycle, according to Mrs Kupsch. 

She said if you think someone you know is in an abusive situation, the most important thing to do is take them to a safe space, and ask if they’re okay. 

“If you think there's something wrong, just go out for a coffee," Mrs Kupsch said.

Leaving an abusive relationship can be dangerous, and victims need support from friends, family and legal and support services, she said. 

"When you do actually leave that abusive relationship, that's when you’re liable to get really hurt, or dead,” Mrs Kupsch said.

“With my daughter, that's what happened, she went to tell him it was all over and he killed her.

“That's what happens, it's the finality of the relationship is where it gets really, really rugged, so they need to be somewhere safe."

The knowledge that Jessica’s death raised awareness serves as a comfort to Mrs Kupsch. 

“I do know of those couple [of women] that were at the funeral who I know were having a hard time at home,” Mrs Kupsch said. 

“I know they got stronger, they've left."

Mrs Kupsch lives with post-traumatic stress disorder as a result of the murder. 

“I have good days, I have bad days and I have really rotten days, and you don't know it's coming,” Mrs Kupsch said.

She seeks solace in the memories of her “funny” daughter, who had a “wicked sense of humour”. 

Mrs Kupsch laughed remembering the time Jessica’s dad convinced her she needed to find a sheep to mow her lawn.

"We went up [to her unit] and I could hear this commotion in the laundry,” Mrs Kupsch said.

“'[We asked] what's that?'’, and she said, 'oh, I had to bring the sheep in,'.

 "She's so gullible," she laughed.

The children’s lives were unfairly and irreversibly altered by the tragedy.

"Kacey, when he's sick, he says 'I miss my mummy but I don't want to go to heaven to get her'," Mrs Kupsch said. 

"I've got to say, 'Nanny's here, I'll give you a kiss and a cuddle'.

"I'll always have a broken heart …to lose a child that you have carried and given birth to - it's a part of you,” Mrs Kupsch said. 

"Nobody should have to bury their child at such an early age, through something that never should have happened."