Smile, wave and cast aside all those pesky promises

NEW Year crystal ball time again and what are the chances Premier Lara Giddings keeps her wafty "no Greens in my ministry" commitment should Labor be re- elected come March?

That's apart from Labor's re- election bid reminding us of a sentence incorporating the words "snowball" and "hell".

And another comparing Libs hopeful Will Hodgman to former federal Labor leader Bill Hayden's comments concerning drover's dogs.

New Year's resolutions are made to be broken, aren't they?

So here's a hint to Lara and an easy-peasy way to get over that pledge hurdle, should she limp back in with the Greens' assistance.

Just grin disarmingly (you're s-o-o-o good at that, Lara), wave cheerfully (ditto) and claim that the "no Greens in my time" pledge was just a New Year's resolution that now can't be kept.

A promise made to be broken, so what?

Oh yes, and that you were just joking about backing the pulp mill and will consider an alternative Greens' industrial manifesto including a tofu factory.

Collective guilt-laden sighs of understanding from the punters, knowing sympathetic sideways glances at not having kept one's own promises and everyone gets on with life.

Hey, Nick McKim and Cassy O'Connor back on board too, Nick with the Greens-appeasing yet totally meaningless "Minister for Sustainable Transport" tag. (Unless the Greens reveal an embargoed plan during parliament's first term replacing Metro's diesel omnibuses with 12-person ox- carts).

As for the rest of us, even a mere two days into 2014 and with the unmown backyard lawn still littered with bottle tops, burnt half-chewed snags and broken toys, who has not already quietly broken a heartfelt pledge?

For did you not make an iron- clad New Year's resolution at the start of 2013 about giving up either smokes or booze and/or betting on slow nags?

Resolutions broken even as fireworks exploded in the sky only minutes into the nascent annum?

Here's a sober tip from a non- drinking mate - undertake a resolution that you can't fail to keep, such as his promise not to neck a beer during 2014.

Confession time and this columnist has already broken a vow to never again watch ABC TV's 7pm news.

Ever since the days when you could set your watch by former Greens' leader Peg Putt's nightly news appearance (7.02pm), we have darkly muttered at the "right-on" issues nightly presented by the national broadcaster.

The assumption that whatever interests the ABC's staff - "the Sandalistas" as Sydney commentator Gerard Henderson terms them - in their cloistered inner- city black-skivvied, bicycle- riding, latte-sipping, global warmist world, must interest the rest of us.

That means not only another four-minute yarn about heroic campaigners battling Japanese whaling ships but also brave Greenpeace comrades who still don't get it and seem utterly amazed and indignant at being arrested following their scaling of a Russian oil rig to protest against Arctic Circle drilling. (After the anti-rig crew sailed up in their oil- powered ship, a friend suggested that the Russians "should have drained the vessel of fuel and given the protesters oars and told them to row back where they came from").

Cruel but fair.

Anyway, yours etc's ABC-TV news non-watching scenario has already bitten the dust.

You know, long hot summer nights, cricket wrap-ups, Sydney- Hobart yacht race aftermath.

Oh yes, a tip to Lara on the re- election matter.

Increase your chances of again gracing the treasury benches with resolutions you mean to keep, including ignoring activists who claim some potential job-creation scheme doesn't have a "social licence", repealing the nonsensical non-biodegradable plastic shopping bag ban, slashing Bass Strait ferry visitor fares, expanding Bell Bay as a container port, getting Midland Highway funding and halting legislation forcing egg producers to stamp their eggs.

Some promises are made not to be broken and we'd love you for it.

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